


Lie

by nerigby96



Series: Insult to Injury [9]
Category: Martin and Lewis
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Stream of Consciousness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-22
Updated: 2020-01-22
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:35:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22365730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nerigby96/pseuds/nerigby96
Summary: The Paramount Lot"...the love that we had - that we still have - for each other.""You can talk about love all you want.
Relationships: Jerry Lewis/Dean Martin
Series: Insult to Injury [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1565770
Comments: 12
Kudos: 18





	Lie

“To me,” you say, and already you know it’s a lie, you’re lying, but still your mouth makes noise, because a lie’s at least something, right? A lie’s better than nothing, better than silence, especially for the kid, and look at him, look at him now, look at him looking at you, all that hope and love and worship pouring out of him like honey – for _you_ , Dino, it’s for _you_ – and what do you give him in return? A lie. A gross, disgusting thing that drops from your mouth like a scabrous tongue, festers on the ground, oozing a foetid stench that’ll cling to your hands for the rest of your life, but you’re saying it anyway, you’re still talking, and now you’ve started you won’t stop, you’ll tell it over and over, with pride, maybe, or something like it, but pride that your mouth worked finally, that your tongue and teeth and throat cooperated, that your brain forced something out into the world, that you did something with the words God gave you, even if the thing you chose to do was fucked, awful, the worst thing you could have done, and yet, you’re here, and he’s here, and his eyes brim with tears of—what? Hope? Maybe. _Fuck._ Still he hopes. After everything. After all of it. Everything you’ve done, everything you’ve seen. Maybe that’s the worst of it. The kid’s let you see him and now there’s no shame, embarrassment, no regret in those desperate hazel eyes. You’ve seen him on his back, half-naked, hard and spent. You’ve seen him curled up, silent, haunted by unspeakable darkness. You’ve seen him manic, impish, tearing around, kissing and touching and loving you more than you thought possible, more than a man could ever love another man, surely; and yet you’ve seen it, felt it, all of it, everything he could ever give you. You’ve seen him seeing you. And this is what you give him in return, this is how your mouth repays everything his mouth has done, this is how you show your love; you say, “you’re nothing but a fucking dollar sign.”

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry. But this is where I am.  
> The boys' conversation is taken from _Jerry Lewis in Person_ by Jerry Lewis and Herb Gluck, _Dean & Me: A Love Story_ by Jerry Lewis and James Kaplan, and pretty much anywhere else their breakup story is told.  
> Thank you so much for reading <3


End file.
